Decoding feedback: enthusiasm vs. intent

A founder we spoke to last year had done everything right - or so it seemed. She'd talked to over forty potential users. She'd run demo sessions. She'd collected a spreadsheet full of glowing responses. "This is exactly what I've been looking for." "I'd definitely use this." "Why doesn't this exist already?" By the time she came to us, she was ready to build. The feedback was overwhelming.

Six months and a decent chunk of savings later, she launched. And almost nobody signed up.

Not because the product was bad. Because the feedback was never what she thought it was. Those forty people weren't lying to her - they genuinely meant it in the moment. But meaning it in the moment and reaching for your wallet are two very different things.

"Everyone loves the idea" - and why that should worry you

Here's the uncomfortable truth: most people are nice. When you describe your idea with passion and conviction, the vast majority of humans will smile, nod, and say something encouraging. It costs them nothing and it feels good to be supportive. That's not validation. That's social lubricant.

And it's not just friends and family who do this. Potential customers do it too, especially when there's no price tag in front of them. "Would you use something like this?" is an almost impossible question to answer honestly, because saying yes doesn't commit you to anything. It's the equivalent of telling someone their new haircut looks great - you're not going to live with it, so why not be generous?

Enthusiasm is easy to give. Commitment - time, money, or referrals - is the signal that actually matters.

So if you've spoken to thirty people and every single one was enthusiastic, that's not a green light. If anything, it should make you a bit suspicious. Unanimous praise usually means you haven't asked the hard questions yet.

What real interest actually looks like

The difference between polite enthusiasm and genuine intent comes down to what people do, not what they say. We call these pull signals - moments where the other person is actively trying to get closer to your product, rather than just being agreeable about it.

Pull signals look like this:

• They ask how to get access. Not "that sounds cool" but "how do I get on the list?" or "when can I try it?" There's a world of difference between someone complimenting your cooking and someone asking for the recipe. One is polite. The other suggests they actually want to eat.
• They offer to pay before you've asked. This one's rare, which is exactly why it matters. If someone says "I'd pay for that" unprompted, you're onto something. Better still, ask them to put a number on it. The conversation gets real very quickly.
• They refer other people without being asked. When someone says "you should talk to my colleague Sarah, she's been complaining about this exact problem" - that's a pull signal. They're spending their own social capital to connect you, and people don't do that for ideas they're lukewarm about.
• They follow up. If you speak to someone and they email you a week later asking how it's going, pay attention. Most people forget conversations within hours. The ones who circle back are telling you something important.

If none of this is happening - if you're doing all the chasing, all the prompting, and all the follow-up - that's data too. It just might not be the data you want.

Ask about their life, not your idea

Rob Fitzpatrick wrote a brilliant book called The Mom Test that puts a sharp point on this. The core principle is simple: stop pitching your idea and start asking about the other person's actual behaviour. What do they do today? What's annoying about it? Have they tried to fix it? What did they spend money on?

Because the moment you describe your solution, you've polluted the conversation. You've given them something to react to, and most people will react positively because - as we've covered - they're nice. But if you ask them about the problem before revealing your answer, you get something much more useful: the truth about whether this problem actually keeps them up at night, or whether it's just a mild inconvenience they've already made peace with.

We're not going to rehash the whole book here - go read it, it's short and worth every minute. But the principle matters because it reframes what feedback conversations are for. You're not looking for applause. You're looking for evidence.

The feedback that nearly sank a good idea

We worked with another founder who had the opposite problem. He'd spoken to a dozen people about a compliance tool for small accounting firms, and the feedback was distinctly meh. Lots of "yeah, maybe" and "I suppose that could be useful." He was ready to scrap the idea entirely.

But when we dug into the conversations, something interesting emerged. Three of those twelve people had asked specific questions about integrations with their existing software. Two had forwarded his email to their practice managers. One had asked if there was a trial. The words were lukewarm, but the actions were anything but. Those were pull signals hiding behind British understatement.

He didn't need more enthusiasm. He needed to pay closer attention to what people were actually doing.

So what should you do with all that feedback?

Start by separating the signal from the noise. Go back through your notes - or start taking better ones - and sort every piece of feedback into two columns: things people said, and things people did. The second column is the one that matters.

And if the second column is empty? That's not a disaster. It means your feedback process needs work, not necessarily your idea. Most founders aren't trained in customer discovery - why would you be? It's a skill, and like most skills, it gets better with a bit of structure and practice.

You don't need more conversations. You need better ones.

If you're sitting on a pile of "great idea!" responses and trying to figure out what they actually mean, book a discovery call with us. Thirty minutes, no obligation, and we'll help you work out whether you've got real pull or just polite applause. Either way, you'll leave with something useful.